Unprimed

Summer is in full swing here at my house, and I know this is true because I am increasingly having trouble getting my kids to brush their teeth before noon!  I know, this is disgusting and truly gross, but it really goes to show the level of vacation mode that everyone is in!

 I am loving the unscheduled days and late nights; maybe sometime in the near future we will attempt a summer morning routine, but really, why?

Recently, my husband and I were watching the HGTV show Fixer Upper (if you haven’t seen this yet I highly encourage it; it’s pretty much the best home improvement show EVER), and true to my being I looked over at him and said, “I’m in the mood for a project.”  And much to my surprise, he actually agreed!  Soooooooo, I proceeded to convince him to that we needed to paint, tile, and trim!  It has been a busy few days but completely worth it 🙂

While he was putting up trim in the living room, I noticed that some of it was unprimed.  Unprimed trim meant extra work for me, the designated painter.  The unprimed stuff was gonna soak up the paint like a sponge.  It was going to take double the time.  I was just a little discouraged when I looked at the work ahead!  I mean my house was already a disaster zone with everything taken apart; now I had to deal with unprimed trim!  Oh, yeah this was my idea in the first place (insert eye-roll here).

Discouragement is like that though, right?  It kinda sneaks up on you; at least it does for me!  I am going about my life thinking all is just fine.  I am doing the work.  I am spending my time.  I am praying and praising.  And then out of nowhere comes a little thought.  Not an obviously discouraging thought, but a little tiny voice that sneaks in and reminds you of how long you’ve been praying for something,  Maybe it’s even an almost silent groan that comes from your heart as you just take half a second to remember what it was like when…..

And before you know it, you are tired of hearing all the encouragement.  You cannot stand to see all the pretty and inspirational scriptures shared on Facebook.  It’s all you can do to hold back the screaming you feel coming on when you see those Pinterest boards devoted to lovely words and phrases meant to build up your hope and faith.  Seriously, I feel like I have heard it all, listened to every word, and prayed the way I should pray.  I  have even changed the things I needed to change.  I admit it, lately I have had this feeling that I just I don’t want to hear it anymore!  I want to see MY answered prayer.  I want to be the one who knows what it is like to be on the other side of what I am praying for, because in all honesty, I am ready to just be done.  To give up.  To stop.  To move on.

One of the many things I love about my God is that I don’t have to get it right every time.  I can share my heart with Him and he doesn’t turn the other way.  I am never too much work for Him.

We are heard.  Even in our discouragement.  Even in our anger.  Even in our happy.  We are heard.

At the end of the day, when the work is finished and everything is put back together, we can be grateful for a God who does the work with us; even in our discouragement.  He is soaking up our wants, cries, and fears just like that unprimed trim.  He doesn’t see it as extra work.  He sees the finished product and KNOWS it’s worth the extra time.